People in school around the age of puberty have to take sex ed classes to learn about their changing bodies. Unfortunately, there isn't an equivalent for the equally dramatic changes women experience during menopause later in life. So let's take the space here to examine how women's sex lives shift as they age.
How Sex Drive Changes with Age in Women?
Decreased estrogen production during and after menopause can decrease sex drive. Other side effects of menopause, such as hot flashes, can reduce the likelihood that you're in the mood. Hormone therapy to combat menopause's side effects may also affect libido — sometimes increasing it.
Muscle Atrophy and Vaginal Dryness
According to the U.S. National Institute on Aging, the muscles that make up your vaginal walls can grow thinner and stiffer as you age. You may also have a more challenging time naturally lubricating your vagina. Unfortunately, these issues taken together can make penetrative sex less desirable or even painful.
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Sexual Dysfunction Becomes More Likely
Sexual dysfunctions of all sorts become more likely as you age. A 2013 survey found that while 22% of women under 20 experience sexual dysfunction, around 75% of women aged 40 to 50 did.
If you've been with a partner for a long time, it's natural that you may have ups and downs in both your emotional and sexual relationship. And as your partner ages, they are also more likely to experience sexual dysfunction.
Is It OK To Keep Having Sex as I Age?
Absolutely! It's a great form of exercise, and it can boost your mood and be a way to connect with your partner or partners no matter your age. A 2010 survey indicated that around 20 to 30% of people continue having sex even into their 80s, so you are not alone in your interest.
However, your approach to sex may need to shift. You and your partner may both need more time and patience before getting it on.
Introducing a vibrator into the equation can help women have comfortable sex.
Why Vibrators Are Great for Older Women?
Men are used to approaching doctors for help with erectile dysfunction, but few therapeutic options exist for women with sexual dysfunction. Instead, doctors will sometimes suggest vibrators for postmenopausal women looking to improve libido. Here are a few benefits older women can realize by using vibrators.
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Increase Blood Flow
Vibrators increase blood flow to the vaginal area, making arousal easier to achieve. It is easy to forget that blood flow is vital for men and women. A vibrator with several motors and good battery life can make your vaginal area swell much faster than manual stimulation can.
Sometimes older women may take more time and stimulation for their bodies to lubricate their vaginal walls naturally. With a vibrator, you don't have to worry about inconveniencing a partner with an extended session. You can add lubrication as needed and go as slowly as you desire.
Exercise Your Muscles
Your vaginal walls are muscles that can be trained and toned like other muscles. Using a vibrator regularly can help your vaginal muscles grow thicker, decreasing discomfort during penetration.
Introduce Novelty into Your Relationship
Handing a vibrator to your partner to use on you can be a fun way to spice up your sex life, with the bonus of giving you more time and stimulation to prepare for partnered sex.
Best Vibrators for Older Women
When picking the best vibrator for older women, what should you keep in mind? It depends on your unique situation.
What Issues Are You Solving For?
When considering a sex toy to help overcome sexual dysfunction, think precisely about what you need help with. The issues you're dealing with may change the kind of toy you should get.
Stiff Vaginal Muscles
Do you have trouble relaxing your vaginal walls enough for penetrative sex?
If so, you may want to consider vaginal dilators, which can help you relax your muscles over time. Sex therapists can also work with you to hone muscle relaxation techniques. Your trusty vibrator or dildo can also help you practice by yourself to make encounters with partners comfortable again.
Stale Sex Life
If you need to spice up your sex life, a vibrator can undoubtedly help. However, you may also consider taking sexual therapy, trying a new kink, or even wearing a sexy outfit. Talking with your partner is the essential step.
Some of these lingerie toys come with both a vibe and special underwear that has a pocket designed to hold the vibe. Others just come with a vibrator that's made to slip into any pair of panties you own, so you can rock anything you want — from a classic bikini cut vibrating panty to a crotchless vibrating panty.
Lack of Arousal and Vaginal Dryness
Anything that helps with blood flow and gets you turned on can help in this department. Vibrators are a good bet because the vibration moves blood to the area. Some women, however, may have better luck with a clitoral stimulator or a vibrating wand.
What Should You Look for in Vibrators for Seniors?
If you've determined that a vibrator is a good choice for improving your sex drive, keep an eye out for these critical features.
Ensure that the sex toys you buy are made of high-quality materials that are easy to clean, comfortable on your skin, and won't leach chemicals into your body. Silicone is usually your best bet for toys with motors due to its flexibility and durability. And, because it isn't porous, it's less likely to hold onto microbes after washing.
Stay away from toys made with plastic, rubber, jelly, or vinyl.
Vibrators for seniors can come in many sizes. Opt for slimmer designs when searching for a penetrative vibrator to help treat sexual dysfunction. They will be easier and more comfortable to insert.
With more experience, feel free to reach for vibrators with an enormous girth.
Number of Motors and Their Position
When reading the product descriptions of vibrators, please pay attention to the number of motors they contain and where. Several spread-out motors may do a better job of increasing blood flow throughout the vagina.
Pick a vibrator that comes with many vibration modes, so you have the best likelihood of finding one that works well for you. Your preferences may change as your vaginal walls thicken with exercise, so the more options, the better.
Some vibrators for women are designed to stimulate two areas — usually the G-spot and the clitoris. This option may be perfect for women looking for more stimulation. Consider your situation before making your purchase.
You didn't learn everything you needed to know about sex in high school. As you age and experience menopause, you will need to relearn making sex pleasurable. The good news is that your sex muscles —both in your brain and in your vagina — can be exercised. Using a vibrator can help you enjoy a satisfying sex life for the rest of your days.
How Sex Changes After Menopause. (Accessed February 2022). John Hopkins Medicine.
Sexuality in Later Life. (November 2017). U.S. National Institute on Aging.
Female Sexual Dysfunction: Prevalence and Risk Factors. (December 2013). Journal of Clinical and Diagnostic Research.
10 Surprising Health Benefits of Sex. (October 2013). WebMD.
Sexual behaviors, condom use, and sexual health of Americans over 50: implications for sexual health promotion for older adults. (October 2010). The Journal of Sexual Medicine.
Sexual Devices. (Accessed February 2022). The North American Menopause Society.